I have found that college is a mixed bag on advice. There is plenty of good advice on how to apply but there is very little good advice on everything else.
I have gotten a lot of bad advice, or advice vague enough to be bad. My goal here is to make that into good advice any way I can.
- Your preferences are important, but don’t let them limit you
My junior year, on the first or second day, I found one of those college picker websites. I had already been buffetted by mail for colleges far and wide, plus everyone I’d met had suggestions and opinions. I found a few colleges that looked good, and patted myself on the back for thinning the crowd so easily.
When I showed my list to my family, my mom and sister spent the rest of the afternoon ripping it apart. They both had good intentions, wanting me to broaden my seach, but it was disheartening.
It did benefit me in the end. The college I am going to was not on that first list. Your preferences are important, whether it’s the class size, student life or campus design, but you can’t be too limited, especially at the beginning.
- YOU know what you want.
My sister had a lot of difficulty finding a college. My mom actually found the school in the final months of my sister’s senior year for her. This made her comments about my college seach even more infuriating.
For about a year, every interaction with my sister had to involve college. Whenever I had a list, an idea or concepts of a plan, she had something to say. She was constantly telling me how I should really look for bigger schools, or how her roommate’s dad’s attorney’s mother’s dog goes to this one school I would love. It made me question my decision making.
In the end, I came to the conclusion that she didn’t know what I wanted. You are allowed to have opinions and other people don’t know better. If you want a smaller school, look for smaller schools. You know what feels right.
- It doesn’t always instantly click
The thing I heard constantly when looking for colleges was that I’d know when I saw it. This is not true.
College tours can help you figure out the feel of a campus, I can support that, but sometimes it isn’t a lightbulb moment. Some campuses are great while the schools aren’t, or vice versa. I know it’s not helpful to tell you what it isn’t, but it can save you a lot of pain if you aren’t looking for an indescribable connection that many claim to have.
I didn’t know what school I wanted to go to on first visit. I knew which one was my favorite, which one I felt comfortable in, but angels didn’t sing when I started my tour. I found which one I could live in while learning what I wanted, which took a few months of research and planning. If you did see the light stepping into campus, more power to you. But if you didn’t have that click, that doesn’t mean the college is wrong.
Finding a college is hard. It’s different from person to person. Just remember, through good, bad and vague advice, it’s up to you.
The Uproar will be back after the break. Happy Holidays!
